It Wasn't Criticism

   Criticism. It's a double edged sword, razor thin. Positive or negative. Welcomed openly or disdained. Helpful or hurtful. It all depends on both the person giving it and the one taking it. Is it from someone you admire/respect or someone you don't care for. Is it constructive or destructive? Does it hurt you ego or enlighten you to change for the better? Lots to ponder there. Another layer of my onion just got peeled away.

   After Thursday's IHC class, I was given some criticism by a fellow Student. But before the comment, I was asked if I was open to it. Of course I was open to it, always! I wasn't offended,  I wasn't hurt or angry, I was actually touched that someone else cared enough to try and make me better at Kung Fu. Great big glowing "AHA" moment for me.

   And now I am analyzing the way I "comment/criticize" other people. I know for a fact my mouth gets way ahead of my brain sometimes (ok - most times). I am quick to comment, flippant, sarcastic, and very rarely a positive influence. Ouch, writing that down hurts. What I think is positive criticism may very well be a slap to the face or an insult to another. I need to slow down the wordage and think before I speak, and not just in Kung Fu but in my daily life as well. That will truly be a challenge. 

   So thank you for the criticism Sihing Burke, your comment may have just changed my life, for the better of course.

 

 

Push Ups 25568

Sit Ups 23631

Sparring 640

1609KM 1464.81km

Acts of Kindness 1350 Recorded

Hand Form 450

Weapon Form 440

Mastery recited 18

Front Side Thrust Heel

   Front thrust kick, side heel kick. Apparently I am combining them on my left leg when doing a front thrust kick. I am twisting my left ankle to start the rotation that I would use for a side heel. How did I not notice this? The kick felt correct to me. The kick felt good, the kick felt strong, why would I question anything? I now see I have became complacent in my execution of the technique, crap.

   Mediocrity had crept in and I failed to notice.

   It took an outside eye to notice that things had gone wrong (thanks Deb😉) and I am grateful for that critique, it was a poke to my eye for detail. 

  Now, what else have I let fall apart? 

Push Ups 25268

Sit Ups 23331

Sparring 640

1609KM 142639km

Acts of Kindness Recorded 1325

Hand Form 434

Weapon Form 415

Mastery recited 18

Why I mow

    I don't have to mow the lawns at the Kwoon. I don't have to sweep and clean the Kwoon. I don't have to mop after class. I do it because I want to give back. I do it because it helps Silent River stay pleasing not just to the eyes but also to the soul. I do it because I am proud to be part of this wonderful school. I do it to bring my family closer together. I do it because it brings me a sense of pride when the school looks clean and tidy. I do it because I can. 

   When Kody and I cut the lawns or when Deb, Kody and I sweep and clean the Kwoon, I feel a sense of peace. This school has brought not just Kung Fu into my life but brought my family closer together. To see my son mowing the lawns of his on volition, I grin ear to ear. I know that he will be okay in life, I can see he "gets it". Watching Deb sweep, getting every little sequence from the lions, I see the Black Belt in her, working towards perfection, "good enough" is not good enough. These two souls have found me and made me whole, so proud of them.

   So why do I mow? I mow because I must. It is a part of my martial arts journey. I can not and will not sit on the sidelines watching, I will not wait for someone else to do it, I will do whats right for me to feel like I am giving back, even if it is just an ice cube in an iceberg. 

 

Push Ups 24865

Sit Ups 22931

Sparring 595 unchanged

1609KM 1392.60km

Acts of Kindness Recorded 1300 unchanged

Hand Form 434

Weapon Form 411

Mastery recited 18

Slip of the Intent

    "That was not what I intended". This just keeps racing through my mind. My intent was to spark some interest in our charities to the Young Dragons. One word, that was all it took to derail everything I had already done. Now the entire focus was on that one word. No! Where is my time machine? Right, there is no such thing. Now I must own that terrible moment. I don't want it but it is mine and mine alone. Crap.

   What did I learn from this? Intent is very hard to keep pure if you are not in the moment. My mind was already somewhere else when this happened. I was more concerned with wrapping things up than I was in getting the Young Dragons excited in our charities. Double crap. Now what? Try to repair the damage? Pretend it never happened and move on? I guess I will gauge that next week in class. Triple crap.

   So now to apply this to my Kung Fu because everything I do affects my Kung Fu. It's not like the idea of intent is new to my journey, it may have been brought up here and there. But this was example of losing my intent that was about as subtle as a wrecking ball. So does this mean I gather my intents close to me and over analyze the crap out of everything or I do or extend my being to allow my intents to purify themselves through experiences.? Or somewhere in the middle? 

   I cannot stress just how much this has altered my view of myself. It is as though stepping through that portal of "intentlessness" has opened countless more opportunities to right my journey. How I learn from this will help me understand myself a little bit more me thinks.

   And none of this would have happened if I wasn't given the opportunity to teach. I have learned SO much about myself in the short time I have been involved in helping to instruct fellow students in class. It is the key to my success, without it, my Kung Fu would have not progressed to where it is  today. So thank you for allowing me to be a part of Silent River, it has changed me forever.

 

 

Push Ups 24618

Sit Ups 22681

Sparring 595 unchanged

1609KM 1366.85km

Acts of Kindness Recorded 1300 unchanged

Hand Form 430

Weapon Form 401 unchanged

Mastery recited 18

Universal Truths?

   Funny how things connect sometimes. While working with my Physiotherapist Karen, we were chatting about posture, breathing and low and behold, centering. Stop the presses,  I need to hear her view on this. Now she was approaching it from a Pilates point of view but the similarities were remarkable. We talked compression and expansion,  breathing to your core/center, and muscle interaction between quadrants of your body and so on. Sounds pretty familiar to me I think 😀. So I countered her Pilates with our six harmonies. So many concepts were the same but just slightly different that we were both grinning as we compared notes. 

   One exercise she has me doing has to do with engaging the vertebra one at a time starting at the base of the scull and slowly rolling/engaging all the way down to my pelvis. Shoulder, arms, diaphragm, hips, all engaging separately but together (sound familiar?). Took a bit to get this Pilates move down (very beginner understanding by me so far) but once I vaguely got the basics it felt really good. There are so many steps to make this work, so many separate parts that need to work together to make this effective. Cool! 

   This was just like learning a new form. Learn the steps, apply intent to the steps, allow the steps to write their own vocabulary, enjoy. As I write this I realize I am behind on my reps (Whoops - sorry Karen ).

    So as it tends to happen, the connections between Kung Fu and the vast universe appear everywhere if I just allow these gems to show themselves to me. Western medicine and eastern healing are intertwined whether they like it or not. Foundations of healing thousands of years old are slowly revealing themselves, silently sometimes, to the resistance of the "established" doctrine of western healing. Anyways....

    So to sum it up, Kung Fu is everywhere, and I love it when it unexpectedly peeks around a corner at me and smiles saying "got ya".

 

Push Ups  24378

Sit Ups  22321

Sparring  595

1609KM  1330.55km

Acts of Kindness Recorded 1300

Hand Form  421

Weapon Form  401

Mastery recited 18

The Pros Know a Better Way

   Update on my shoulders. After the better part of five years, my shoulders have finally been diagnosed to the point of treatment. It was, and is, a fairly frustrating process but here I finally am. Now I can make a purposeful plan to move forward with some kind of treatment, FINALLY!

   I saw three professionals last week. One physiotherapist (Monday-Karen), one massage therapist (Wednesday-Alesha) and one acupuncturist (Thursday-Nigel). By Thursday afternoon, I had motion and minimum pain like I haven't felt (not felt?) in decades. Now being Sunday morning that has diminished a bit, but I now know what is possible with just one series of treatments. I am excited to repeat this next week and I am hoping for similar results. A lot of this requires me to do my "exercises", but that is such a small investment in myself it is a no-brainer.

And this gets me excited for Kung Fu. 

   Expansion. I love the idea/reason/necessity for expansion but I shy away from it because of the pain it can cause me. Extending myself to fully expand is something I haven't done in quite a while (years!!). And that prevents me from doing so much of what I need to do to fully engage my six harmonies that at times it frustrates me to no end. I really notice it in my forms. And I have been using it as a crutch, an excuse. But hopefully I can now minimize this impediment and move forward, fully experiencing the joy of expansion (I'm smiling right now). 

   It will be slow and cautious at first, expanding slowly to my "maximum", I don't want to overdo it right out of the gate, but once I have tested my "boundaries", I will dip my toe outside of them and see how wondrous that can feel.

   Is this a new chapter in my Kung Fu journey? Why yes, yes it is. Sweeeeeet.

 

Push Ups  23778

Sit Ups   217211

Sparring   550 (unchanged)

1609KM   1296.74km

Acts of Kindness Recorded  1250 ( zero recorded - my bad - lazy)

Hand Form   410

Weapon Form    375 (unchanged)

Mastery recited 18

Maintain Inspiration

   It was a good week. Lots of engagement, lots of sweat and activity. Just cruzin along. After last weeks' lack of a blog, I came to some realizations. Sometimes inspiration is just plain old elusive and regular maintenance is okay in the meantime. 

   I was very frustrated last week. I felt I had absolutely nothing to blog about. Usually I have the gift of gab (digital), but last week I was bogged down with overthinking about what to blog about. I had nothing that stood out and felt "special". Why why why?! I am training regularly, I go to as many classes as I am physically able to, I pay attention, I participate, I engage. So why was there no inspiration to be found? 

   Am I over Kung Fuing, exhausting myself physically and mentally? Na, that's silly. Am I thinking to much and not enjoying where I am and what I am doing? Getting closer. Is it a combination of both? Maybe. Again, I could chase this and overthink it to death but I won't. I'll just do some Kung Fu and let the universe direct me and guide me.

   So to wrap this up. I cannot force inspiration, it must happen all by itself. But I must give it opportunity to present itself and this comes through purposeful and intentional training and engagement. If there is no inspiration I know it is me and not Kung Fu that is the culprit.

 

.Deb and Bailey enjoying a little quiet time on the shore of Lake Edith at my cousin Mike's cabin in Jasper. Beautiful.

My Cousin Mike and his new Tahoe, delivered to him in Jasper yesterday by Deb, Kody and I, all smiles from him, another step for him to recovering losing so much in the Jasper wildfire. He lost his house, absolutely burnt to the ground, nothing at all left. Everything he had that was his mother's, gone. Everything from the first 60+ years of his life is no more - ashes. My heart aches for him but like I said to him yesterday, now it's his turn. He has given so much to so many in his life, now it is coming back to him ten fold. He is loved by many and whether he likes it or not, we will give back to him till he is tired of our faces. Love you my brother from another mother.

P.S. The wildfire not only took his house but was within a 100' of taking his cabin as well. So a HUGE thank you to every single person who fought this monstrous demon of a fire, Heros, every single one of you, true heros, thank you.

Push Ups  23058

Sit Ups   21001

Sparring   550

1609KM km   1258.79km

Acts of Kindness Recorded  1250

Hand Form   400

Weapon Form    375

Mastery recited 18