You Live it or Lie it

    Metallica "Frantic", this song and it's lyrics are ringing so true with me right now. You either know the song or not, but three particular lines are kicking me in the butt pretty hard. 

If I could have my wasted days back
Would I use them to get back on track?

 and 

 My lifestyle determines my deathstyle 

and

You live it or lie it!

   Weave what you want into those three passages. I am using them as nuclear powered motivation. In fact right now I am shaking with anger and anxiety over thinking about the time I have wasted in my life, so much I should have done, people that are gone that I should have spent more time with, so many missed opportunities, to much time waiting on others, so many things left unsaid to those I care about. Life is way to short and I am way to old to waste what I have left. 

   Sorry for the tone of the blog but my Favorite Auntie Connie ( my Dad's sister ) passed away yesterday and I haven't seen her in years, totally my fault, and now I will never see her again. I am totally (bad word) at myself for this. Wasted time, gone,

Mirror Mirror on the Wall

    I have fallen off the wagon, I am wallowing in a pity party of one. Since late December, my training has outright sucked. No good reason, no injuries, just plain old lazy. I'm not sure what has changed because I think about Kung Fu all the time, but mediocrity has planted itself firmly in my lap. I look back at my log book and it is a embarrassment of zeros (yes I record my numbers every day, zeros included). Sure I have had some bumps in the road over the past 3ish weeks but that is just an excuse. Prime example was yesterday, I had a golden opportunity to train, instead, I napped in my chair. Now I am both mad and disappointed in myself, but what am I going to do about it? 

All I can do is to start anew, so right now, I am going downstairs to train. Lets hope this is the start of a new attitude, a personal butt kicking, an eviction of the mediocrity presence I have created for myself. And hopefully, the last time I have to write about this.

161 Good Bad and Ugly

    So this is my 161st blog in a row, 3 straight years, never missed one, I am pretty proud of that. But upon reviewing some of my posts, I find an awful lot of repetition, the same theme over and over. Some I can tell what was going on at that time and the blog brings me back to that moment. Some are cookie cutter blogs that bring back no memory of where I was at that time in my training. I must admit I am disappointed in myself for that. There are supposed to be a tale of my Kung Fu journey, not a Saturday night rerun. 

   This brings me to a bigger problem I am having. I have started to notice that I am compartmentalizing my training (this sounds like a good next blog subject). My blog is separate from my training, my training separate from my daily life, my daily life is separate from my Kung Fu. Everything is given a chunk/allotment of time. When it's time is up, done or not, it is time to move on. This is causing me to cut short things in my life that need a much more attention, I need to blur the lines a little and blend more Kung Fu into everything I do.

   Blogging is unfortunately one of those things that I have whittled down the time I spend doing so I can free up time for other things, and because of that, the quality of my blogs have plummeted. And that is affecting other aspects of my training as well. I now spend so much time lamenting over the quality of my blog that it cause me to not focus on the here and now because I am constantly thinking about trying to my make my next blog better. Catch 22. I need to be mindful of what I am doing at any given moment, but, I need to be mindful of what would make a good blog, and so on.....

   I am looking forward to next years blogging requirements, 30 extra blogs. That's right 30 extra, on top of my weekly blogs. If this doesn't kick my blog quality up a notch, well, at least I now know that I am never going to be the next big Canadian author.

   I don't know if this blog came across the way I wanted it to, but maybe 162 will.

Hungry

    Well I am back from a trip that I enjoyed thoroughly. Eight days of fun in the sun in Mexico. Much needed, loved every second, can't wait to do it again. But....

   Boy did I miss being at the Kwoon. I tried to do Kung Fu everyday, in the pool, on the beach, in our room. I was there for the 2 online classes via zoom, but it is not the same. Being there at the Kwoon you are fully engaged, all in, no distractions, not the same when you are trying your best to stay focused and not look at the sea, surf, sky or sand. I found it incredibly frustrating personally, and it made me hungry to be back at the Kwoon. 

   So look out Kwoon, I am back tomorrow, gung-ho and ready to sweat, ready to feed my soul with some much needed Kung Fu.

Me moment

 Just wanted to share a Caribbean Sea sunrise. 

https://vimeo.com/662954819

State of Matter

    It’s funny how little differences can make such a dramatic change to something relatively easy. Water verses air. Do a form in the air like you do all the time, then for funzies, do it in water.

    Kody and I were doing Tai chi 1 and Lau Gau in the pool today (we are in Puerto Morelos Mexico right now) and man is that hard. The resistance of the water amplifies everything you do 10 fold. If your stance is off or you over-extend forget about the next move cause it ain’t gonna happen. Works muscles I didn’t know I had. I am enjoying this quite a bit. Sure we are getting some funny looks but so what, I’m having fun. So much so I will do it again tomorrow, and just for extra fun I might try it in the ocean. That should be interesting.