Rigid

    I can be pretty set in my ways sometimes, sorry, make that most times. When I have something set in my mind it is usually pretty hard for someone else to change it. Work, home, social, it all has it's own mental constructs and expectations for me, and I am usually fairly rigid in my unwillingness to allow it to change. My ego tries to force me to bend others to my will whether it be through force or constant pestering, I am set in my ways and opinions. It is hard for me to admit failure or error or that my way isn't the right way. 

   I have been trying to change this about myself. Specifically I have been noting when I find myself being "inflexible" in a given situation and then forcing myself to look through someone else's eyes. The question I pose to myself is "why am I right and am I truley right or just being a jerk?". Shockingly 😮 I find I am being a jerk more often than not. Wow, how can this be? Now to qualify, "jerk" to me means I am refusing to ponder the other persons reasoning because I think my own is superior to theirs. 

   Here is a little example that happened just yesterday. Kody and I were working on phase II of the pergola in the backyard. I have a vision of style, form and function set in my mind, a grand vision if you will.  It is not on paper or drawn out anywhere, it is in my head only, and to understand my vision you must understand me (good luck with that!!). So as we were preparing to set the length of some of the rafters, Kody shared his vision and reasoning that was in stark contrast to mine. My immediate reaction was no way, that is not my vision! But instead I took a step back and tried to understand his. And well crap, his made more sense than mine. Yea, personal growth for me...but the most memorable part was the look on Kody's face, utter shock that I was admitting (allowing?) that his idea was better than mine. He even questioned my decision to go with his design over mine. I now feel looking back on this that that one little situation changed us both, just a little bit but tangible enough to matter. 

 

   It felt good to go down this road, it is not one I travel frequently, and I think I am going to enjoy the view.  

 

 

Push Ups  6811

Sit Ups  6343

Sparring min 450

1609KM 689.07km

Acts of Kindness 735 recorded

 Hand Form  160

Weapon Form  180

Mastery recited 18