That Darn Mirror

   Addled. Befuddled. Wooly-headed. Confused. These are all PG rated words to use for my first moves in my hand form in the Tiger Challenge yesterday. Let me break down this train wreck. I walk into the ring, feeling good, ready, confident in what I am about to do. I say my hellos to the judges, I get permission to proceed. I step back and take a breath, then it happened......

   Back story before I proceed. When you teach someone else a form you usually "mirror" them, facing them and doing the "mirrored" techniques of what you want them to learn. Makes sense and works well. Well guess what...

   Back to my original train wreck. So I take my first step, to the right, not to the left, in Lao Gar. Immediately I know I have crashes and burned. it's the first step in the form and I am already screaming "OMG what am I doing"!!??  Well I am mirroring the first set of moves of course, you know, the ones I have done dozens of times in the kids classes. I can feel my blood pressure spike, I can feel a burning rage inside me, I've screwed up, Again. I should just stop, hang my head in shame and defeat, walk off and hide in a corner (I really want to by the way)? 

   Well thankfully I don't quit. I throw caution to the wind and wing it, somehow recovering my orientation to the form. From here on in I am hyper aware of my directions and it is consuming my every thought. I honestly DO NOT remember even finishing the form, my body was on autopilot. When it was done all I wanted to do was scream very nasty words at myself. I was furious with myself. I was seeing red, not good. It took a while to regain "Me" and carry on but I know this has set my tone for the rest of the Tiger Challenge. 

   So long story short, I actually did have a great day yesterday, I wouldn't have missed it for the world, not even the EE football home game that was on at the same time. As is usual, there are lessons for me to learn from this, apparently one of them is a rage issue and how to calm myself when it happens. Life is funny, always throwing curve balls at you, always trying to trip you up. Well life, this is for you...

 

P/UP 12,432

S/UP 12,370

SPAR 270 min

1609 KM 622.12km

AOK 525 recorded

HAND FORM 135

WEAPON FORM 155

MASTERY 11

Admit It

   I must honestly admit I have no plan for this blog, first time in a long time. Sure I have ideas, but as I put thought to them I realize I am just rehashing old thoughts, re-blogging things I have blogged about many times. I guess sometimes the old thought-pit runs a little dry. So I am just going to run with my random thoughts of the moment for this one and see where it takes me.

   But as I type this, I feel good. Life has been it's normal spurt of busyness, nothing to overwhelming, just life, and that brings a certain amount of peace with it. 

   Yes this Saturday is the Tiger Challenge AND the first Home Football game right after, awesome, two things I love in one day! It will be rushed, but so what, I will  be smiling all day long.

   Yes next Saturday is the Farmers day parade and we have a float to build from scratch, but I have 100% confidence in the team that they will pull together a kick butt product, they always do. So no worries there. 

   As for my Kung Fu, aches and pains aside, I practice, I adjust, I ask questions, I adjust more, I repeat. It progresses therefor I progress. It may be very minuet sometimes but I'll take it all in stride. The journey continues and I am just a willing passenger, enjoying every step, grateful to be allowed to be part of experience. 

   So there, a blog about nothing in particular, and I kinda liked it, see you all on the mats.

 

 

P/UP 11622

S/UP 11560

SPAR 170 min

1609 KM 581.07km

AOK 400 recorded

HAND FORM 95

WEAPON FORM 115

MASTERY 10

My Magnifying Glass

    I see you, you see me. Your actions can affect me as much as my actions can affect you. So I must have intent when I am doing my Kung Fu. My moves, words, actions all must have the proper intent every time I do them. The affect I have on others must produce the desired effect of progress that I intend.

   This is how I am trying to approaching my Kung Fu now. In case you never noticed I am a bit of a goof off. I have spent many a decade goofing around, joking around about everything, never really applying myself to the task at hand if it is too hard for me. And I have found that creeping into my Kung Fu every now and then. The goofing around equates to excuses, and the excuses equate to mediocrity. Ouch.

    Last Thursday I had the privilege of coming up with a lesson plan for the kids classes. It took me three days to come up with 15 minutes (x3 for 3 classes) of purposeful applicable intent-full Kung Fu. I felt like this was a final exam in high school (many many years ago in 1988). Prep, simulate, re-prep, re-simulate, and so on. And then it was time to face the fire, no goofing around allowed.

   Now I am by far my own hardest critic and the cracks in my plans showed up as vast fissures in my mind. First I didn't take into account the skill levels of each class, I only had one game plan for all. I had no plan "B" for when things slowed or didn't go where I intended. Second, I didn't control the class the way I should have. My focus was to narrow, I wasn't seeing the big picture as I should have. These are incredibly valuable lessons for me. It puts me in even more awe of other instructors and how flawlessly they seem to react and adapt. I can only hope that with more experience and guidance that someday down the road I too will be able to show the mastery that the instructors at our school possess.

   So by seeing the way the students reacted to my intended lesson, their actions caused me to look at my actions leading up to Thursday. I can see the flaws in my intent now, but can I change them? I guess better to ask how to change them. Their actions opened up new avenues of ideas, be them good or bad, for me. This has really caused some deep reflection on my part, and I am kinda liking where it is leading me.

   

 

P/UP 10627

S/UP 10600

SPAR 160 min (no change)

1609 KM 501.36km

AOK 350 recorded

HAND FORM 85

WEAPON FORM 100

MASTERY 9

In Awe of Reality

   How did I ever get here? 

   I'm 54 years old. I'm of Canadian/Swedish decent. I had severe Asthma as a child/young adult. I was born and raised in the Edmonton/St Albert area. I have never considered my life to extraordinary. And yet somehow I am now a Black Belt in the ancient martial art of Kung Fu. Not only that but an instructor in the kids classes in the ancient martial art of Kung Fu. This can't be real, can it? There is no world in which I ever dreamed that this is where I would be at this point in my life. I am in state of total awe.

   To be surrounded by so many amazing people, to be doing what I want to do even though I never really knew this is what I actually wanted to do, I am truly amazed each and every day I wake up to this reality. I never want to take it for granted any of the truly special people in my life. My wife, my children/grandchildren, my mother and my Kung Fu family, I love you all. You mold me into the person I am, pushing me every day to be better. Thank you, never stop.

   

 

Kat, since you are always posting songs that resonate with you, here is one of my current favs that just makes me aware of being alive. It is actually a very sad song but I change it a little to make me realize all the good in my life and how I must cherish it each and every day.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qYDhazgrn40

What Matters

    The Bjorkquist clan has been away all week on a family outing in Mexico. This trip has been a bucket list item of mine for 30+ years (Cabo San Lucas). It has been marvellous. Fantastic weather, food, scenery, people and most importantly, family time. We (Deb, Kody and I), have many more memories to add to our shared times together, and that is the most important thing to me. I am not saying things went perfectly, life always has bumps, but it is how you handle them that matters. We have had some room issues, tummy troubles, missed opportunities, but these are trivial compared to the unbelievable memories we will have from the time spent together enjoying life. 

   But this has been at the expense of my training and participation in Kung Fu. Poor Wifi, forgetting about our time zone difference, rushed schedule, crowded pools, and an unexpectedly strong rip tide limited what I wanted to do. Mentally I was constantly thinking about Kung Fu, but physically not so much. Needless to say I am anxious to get back at it Tuesday when we are back at home. But that will be tough as well, our plane doesn’t get in till after midnight on Monday, then customs, drive home, work on Tuesday (Deb was smart enough to take Tuesday off, I wasn’t). Poor planning on my part, oh well. 

   So while I missed a weeks worth of classes, I gained a lifetime worth of memories with those I love. Truly what matters the most to me. 

   Now to get back at it. I have numbers to work on, forms to tweak, Tiger Challenge to prepare for, classes to attend and a weeks worth of sloth to crush.

P/UP 9967 (no change)

S/UP 9840 (no change)

SPAR 160 min (no change)

1609 KM 443.28 km (watch broken, no data)

AOK 300 recorded (no change)

HAND FORM 80

WEAPON FORM 90 (no change)

MASTERY 8