On with the Show

    Beta version. My basement versus the Kwoon. In my mind versus in front of a crowd. Ego versus ability. Me versus Me. It was quite the battle for me on this last Thursday ( March 25, 2021 ) in class. I thought I had a fun little ditty ready to go for my beta version of my weapon form. I had even taken half the day off work to iron out a few kinks and add a few more moves. Felt pretty good about where I was at with the form in my basement. Did a little warm up in class, moves were still feeling good, mind was clear, body was willing, ego was in check, I was 5 by 5. And then it happened. My turn to show my stuff. My ego raced out there and took control, hard, fast, wide, move boy move!! My mind jumped in and screamed "that's not how we practiced this, slow down you fool!!". My body said "whoa old fella, you are gonna break a hip!". Then I faltered, I forgot everything I had come up with. Icebergs appeared in my flow, huge obstacles blocking my way, first a missed move, then a mental stumble as I tried to recover, my landmarks in the basement were gone, no way to recover. Fail! Or was it.

   In Saturdays meeting, we talked about Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. One of the "lessons/ideals/philosophies?" in the book is about the ego climber. That was me on Thursday. I approached the demo in totally the wrong way. The demo was a hurtle to me, not a chance to grow from the experience. I didn't stop and smell the roses, I raced towards the finish line to get the job done. I missed everything that the demo was supposed to bring out in me. I missed everything Zen was teaching me. It took a couple of days for this to sink in, and when it did, boom. I think I get it now. Now to apply it.

   So I will work on my demo some more, I will enjoy my progress AND my stumbles. This isn't a race, it is a journey. Now that it is a little nicer outside, I can get out and practice in the great outdoors, spreading my wings, stretching my form, finishing my techniques, breathing!!

Tic Tok

    Last night at supper, the family and I were discussing Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. I was actually quiet surprised how much of the context of the book I was able to discuss from memory because it has been a year since I last read the book. It also made me realize that I haven't finished the assigned questions for black belt grading. I am about 3/4 of the way done the assignment but put it on the back burner so Deb and Kody could read my copy of the book. It is now 6 months since I stopped my work on the questions and I still haven't finished, bad Don. I will rectify that immediately. 

   This brings me to where I am at. Time. Putting things off till later. Procrastination. I know I only have a finite amount of "laters: left. And procrastination is killing them off one by one. All on me. Just thinking about time stresses me out. A good portion of my wasted time is spent waiting on others. This no longer serves me. I use that as an excuse to procrastinate, and it eats away at what little time I have left. I need to start using my time so that it serves me first, or I will never get done what I want to get done in life. So no more waiting, I have things to do and NO time to waste.

Edge of an Old Guy Rant

   It's funny how as I age I start to sound like the stereotypical old guy, you know, "get off my lawn you young punks", or "I remember when", or "kids today", etc... makes me laugh at myself sometimes. In my minds eye, I'm still 25 or 30 or 40 or 45, in reality, not so much. This reality really shows it's wrinkly old many chinned face during the fitness class. Don't get me wrong, I love the class, I need the class, but my body just doesn't seem to want to listen to the reasons why. Before the class starts, I am pumped, raring to go. During the class, there is sweat everywhere, moans and groans fill the air ( among other things ), but I am smiling ear to ear. After the class, well that is when age says to me "what was that you old fart, I think it's nap time?!". 

   This year I am really pushing myself physically. I am grabbing whatever fitness opportunity presents itself. It is hard some days to flick the go switch, but as Master Brinker says, "the best thing to do if you don't want to train is to train". I am taking that to heart this year, and I am starting to get why he says that. Like right here, right now, writing this blog, my body is saying "babble on Don, the longer the blog is, the longer you can sit and enjoy your coffee". In the words of the immortal Mr T, "shut up fool", that is my other inner voices' way of telling me to get off my butt and do some training. So off to train I go. 

P.S. I am not a fan of the time change, I keep looking at the clock thinking, yikes, it is almost 8am, get moving before it's lunch time!!

Where am I

   Been a while since I have thrown out my numbers for the world to see, my bad. Here is a brief summary of my day 24 of the Ox year so far.

Push ups     4216/50000

Sit ups        4746/50000

1609KM    174.9KM/1609KM

1000 AOK 109/1000

Hand form 12/1000

Weapon form 1/2 way to a demo worthy form (2 tomahawk style axes, still looking for the "perfect" axes)

So as I can see now that it is typed out in front of me, doing okay in some numbers and sucky in others. 

   One of my main goals this year is fitness. Yes this is a very general word, it can mean something different to every single person. To me, it means, well..... hmmm, that just stopped my train of thought dead in it's tracks. I thought I had what it means to me figured out, guess I was wrong. So hang on while I talk myself through this. 

   Do I want to live as long and healthy as possible ( I am over 50 remember ), yes. Do I want to be able to partake in any activity that presents itself, yes. Do I want to feel good about my self image and how others see me, yes ( sounds vain but I'm being honest ). Do I want to be a contributor to society or a burden, contributor of course ( more thought on this later maybe ). Do I want to "feel" that I am at my best physically and mentally, yes. So many points to ponder, so many rabbit holes to jump down, all with the same answer, "yes, I want to be the best me that I can". Fitness is one of the key steps to make this happen. 

   This year of the Ox, my family and fellow Kung Fu'ers have really stepped up their game and that is making it sooo much easier for me to do FITNESS. From Saturday morning fitness classes with Sifu Thomson, to the hip opening challenge by Mrs Ferris, Tai Chi with Sifu Dennis, regular evening classes, the I Ho Chaun and the my wife putting out weekly challenges, the list goes on and on. All of it pure gold. 

   If left up to my own devices, I might force myself to do maybe do 1/2 of what I am doing now. But because of the actions of all those around me, if I fail, it's not just me I am affecting. I need that pressure I guess, it seems to drive me a little harder, it is necessary in my training. This is a good thing, it helps me see who I am in this for, mental fitness time. Please don't take this last paragraph the wrong way, it was an light bulb moment that I need to spend some time with.

   I don't think I really answered my question on fitness, so I am going to go train for a while and peel back some more layers of that onion.